at work.

Regardless of how many days I have worked in a row, shifts on Friday always seem to go well. Everyone is happy, looking forward to the weekend, etc. My anticipation for a good Friday died early in my morning when I was in the middle of bathing a resident.

He clocks in to be well over 300 lbs, possibly 400. I had finally finished getting a good lather going from head to toe on him (which took a solid 10 minutes of scrubbing!) when I reached for the shower head to give him a rinse. No sooner had I started to rinse him off, the shower head exploded off the hose, spraying water absolutely everywhere. I was able to turn off the water before too much damage was done, but the entire bathroom floor, as well as my pants, were soaked. I was in a pickle: I have a 350 lbs man covered in suds, soaked in water, stark-naked, sitting on a chair in a shower with no way to rinse off. I couldn't even turn on the water so that it would trickle out - it literally sprayed 360 degrees from its opening. I couldn't disconnect the hose from its base at the top of the shower, so I was completely hooped. It was only 730am and the boss wouldn't be coming in for another hour. And the maintenance man wouldn't be in until freakin' Monday.

Seeing how I can't just leave an naked fat man covered in suds sitting in a shower, I had to make a Plan B. So, I used an ice cream container I found in his fridge, previously used for storing ice, as a scoop. Then I filled up the bathroom sink with water and proceeded to rinse him off with a 1L ice cream bucket. I don't know how, but I managed to rinse and dry every fold, nook, and cranny in time for seeing the next resident.

Although my pants remained soggy for the remainder of the morning, my Friday did redeem itself and the rest of the day was stellar. Hopefully not all Fridays are a repeat of this one.

D.

when mom is out of town.

For as long as I can remember, my house had always functioned differently whenever Mom was out of town. (Actually, I don't think it functioned at all. That could be why she rarely left.) When Mom was out for the day/whatever, Dad would be in charge. All of us kids would just kinda grin and bite our tongues as Dad did what he thought was best for us. Here are some of my favorites:

• for dinner he once melted cheese over rice
• when doing my hair, we would use an entire tube of gel and slick every single strand back into a wicked-tight ponytail. Sometimes, it was so tight that it felt as if my eyes were pulled back and my nationality had changed.
• he always replayed the funny part of a movie over and over and over and over and over again until the humor died.
• then, he'd rent the movie mentioned above the following weekend just to watch the same part over and over and over and over and over... (this still happens, btw!)

And here are some of his 'habits' that are going on this week:

• washing the kitchen counters with Windex
• making lemonade by: pealing & chopping lemons into teeny tiny pieces and mashing them into a pitcher filled with 94085439853 scoops of sugar. So much for a lemon squeezer!
• turning up the radio until the house thuds just to listen to his favorite song during dinner time - then, leaving it blasting while the of radio program continues in the midst of dinner with us yelling at each other across the table
• washing dishes by hand. We have a dishwasher.

Sometimes I just have to laugh. He is so set in his ways. Oh, I love my Dad!

D.

believe it or not,

but this actually happened:

This morning an emergency staff meeting was called while I was on shift. Everyone on duty meet together with our boss-lady, who was looking rather somber. Turns out, a resident is missing $10,000 dollars from their suite. Ten freakin' thousand big ones. All a sudden I feel as if I am working in a zoo!!!!! What happened to order in a seniors home?!

She continued to tell us that the police are involved and an investigation is underway. All of the staff have to be interviewed too. Which is going to fabulous, seeing how I see this certain resident every single shift, twice or more every time. Greeeaaattttt.

I'm not sure why a resident would leave this much cash in thier suite, but hey - it's supposed to be a home! But what is concerning is how large the 'suspect' pool is: everyone working has a key to all the suites (this includes care aides, cleaning ladies, kitchen helpers, cooks, & maintenance men), delivery guys are allowed up, taxi drivers, friends, family, and so on and on and on and on. And all the other residents too! Goodness me. What a mess.

Imagine seeing that much cash just laying around (yes, it was cash - apparently in 20's, 50's, & 100's too). Would it even be possible to just shove it in your pocket and leave?? But first - how could anyone with a conscious do that?!?!?!?!

What a crazy day.

happy birthday to me!

Yes, 19 years ago today I changed the lives of my parents forever. I gave their 'newbie' parenting skills a run for their money, that's for sure. There was no way to know what a little ball of 'fun' I would be...

Fast forward 19 years and look! We all made it! I'm so thankful for my folks and all that they've done for me throughout my life. I know I gave them many, many, many challenging moments - both intentionally and unintentionally - but there was never a thing they couldn't deal with.

So thanks parents, for 19 great years!! I am looking forward to many more ahead. I love you guys!

D.

inexcusable.

Sometimes it's tough being the new person at work. Not only do you have to learn your job, but you have to learn to navigate the social strings too.

I think I've got the first part down pat, but the second part always takes a bit of time. Unfortunately, hearing things through the grapevine seems to dictate how people work together. With an entirely female staff, the staff room can get a tad catty. But sometimes, you find out important things.

Another aide and I found it odd that a certain resident came down for breakfast wearing the same clothes she had worn yesterday. Usually, this isn't a big deal, but this resident in particular has AM care, meaning that someone at work is responsible for making sure she is wearing p.j.'s to bed and fresh clothes in the morning. This is especially important for this lady because has dementia and is notorious for being confused.

Well, when my coworker realized that it was "Jane" who had neglected to properly give AM care for this resident, she spilled on the beans on a much bigger story. Apparently, Jane is notorious for skimping on her duties in a major way. For example, while providing AM care for another resident who is 94, legally blind and excessively frail, Jane will just plop herself down on the resident's couch and wait until the poor lady has finished struggling through her routine. I guess Jane has also totally laid down and shut her eyes during care a few times too. ( I don't know what she is thinking - these people are not stupid. The seniors catch a lot more than she thinks they do. ) Her attitude is absolutely appalling, seeing how anyone would be nervous to leave this resident unattended for even a moment on her feet.

Other residents have reported that she will primp herself in their bathroom mirrors during her shift as well - whether she is doing care or delivering meds, many people have commented on her selfish actions when she stops in.

Sure, I can see slacking off in a retail job, desk job, etc. - taking shortcuts, cutting corners. Not saying it's right, but it does happens. But when your responsible for someone else's well-being and safety, it is inexcusable.

D.

teens.

There was a massive car accident just outside of town a few days ago. A bunch of boys, most of them being 16/17, were racing their cars while drunk at 5am. They crashed into each other - one boy died and the rest were rushed to the ER.

Most of the survivors are still in the ICU. A boy lost his ear and broke both elbows. Another has brain damage. One is gone. And one of the drivers already had a rap sheet for drunk driving prior to that night.

But what might be most disturbing is that the FB walls of their boys are covered with posts like "get better soon bro so we can party it up!" and "man... I miss my favorite drinking buddy!", etc.

Shouldn't this be a message for their friends that maybe, just maybe, their lifestyles of getting hammered and being stupid isn't the best choice? That maybe there is a better way to grow up?

The kids in the town need to see the seriousness of this accident and recognize it as a wake-up call.

sad.

At work we have a whiteboard in the staff room that has a bunch of important information on it - things like which resident is away, who has new medications, who in the hospital, etc. And I suppose that this day would come sooner or later - but one of my 'friends' has been admitted to the hospital with an unpromising diagnosis. Rumor has it that he has cancer, but we are still waiting for the final say.

I guess this is reality when you build friendships with 94 year old residents. But it is a hard truth to face.

D.