what are you doing new years?

"Ah, but in case I stand one little chance,

Here comes the jackpot question in advance.

What are you doing New Years,

New Years Eve?

Wonder whose arms will hold you good and tight,

When it's exactly twelve o'clock that night

Welcoming in the New Year

New Year's Eve

What are you doing New Years Eve?"

This is the first time in my history of New Year celebrations that I've actually planned to do something! The impulsive side of my 18 year-old mind is finding itself drawn to a masquerade party being thrown at a local pub in the ritzy downtown area of Edmonton, while the logical side is 'are you nuts? nu-uh : this is a galaxy outside your comfort zone! Dancing? Staying up late? TSK!' But now I'm shrugging it off. Oh well. The rebellious side of me has gotta shine through once in a while, right?

But this is as rebellious as it gets, folks. My girlfriends and I are going out to dance and eat large amounts of deep-friend food until the clock is well into the new year. At a fancy joint. On the classiest street of Edmonton. This is the extent of my 'partying'.

We are leaving the drunk-dancing and boy ogling to the girls of the trashy clubs down the street.

Did I mention this was a masquerade?! Who doesn't like to wear a fancy mask and act all mysterious? Just getting dressed up in general is fabulous. I'm very excited, but also a tad anxious, despite the fact that I've already confirmed who is attending, how everyone is getting to the event, where we are meeting, how we are leaving, and where we are crashing.... I can't help the OCD-side of my brain! I can't function without a plan, a back up plan, and a set of last resorts.

Ha, some rebellious streak I have.

Anywho. Enjoy your New Years Eve, whether you are going out downtown or catching a few extra zzz's after a long week. I wish you a happy and healthy new year!

Loveeeeee, Dani.

my new year's list.

Although I really hate goals and such, I really love lists.

I would rather die than pledge myself to do something, but would happily die trying to complete a list.

So that's exactly what I'm going to do!

And I'll update it frequently, cause what I want to do shouldn't take more than a year. Hopefully.

Here's a list of all the thing's I'm going to do/reach in 2010.

My To-Do's in 2010.

(everything accomplished will be bolded. )

1. get into the BScN at GMU for 2010.

2. finish Cell Microbiology with a swell mark... final % to be determined.

3. make a full dindin for the family

4. join a Young Adults group @ a church.

5. run a 10k race

6. run a 1/2 marathon

7. work at camp, hopefully for four months. but two is ok too.

8. move out.

9. create a long-term savings account/jar/money stash under my bed or in the bank.

10. buy the John Mayer album, Battle Studies

12. get +1 earpiercing.

13. get +1 tattoo

14. own a Magic Bullet, so I can feel magical when I attempt to make food.

15. see Avatar with Brooklynn.

16. take good pictures of good memories.

17. buy a teal ring.

18. go blonde.

19. finally resign from Starbucks.

20. find a PT job during schoooooool.

Hurray! Good luck to me, and to all of you!

Love, Dani.

joy.

In a week I move out! Wahooo!! If it wasn't obvious, I'm very excited.

Not only am I excited, but I'm filled with joy.

I am more excited to begin at Grant Mac than I ever was at the prospect of leaving for BC.

I think that this is what my time spent in limbo developed in me - patience, a deeper appreciation for education, and a stronger faith.

Studying nursing in September verified the fact that nursing is career I will love, as well as the fact that my family is too important to be away from.

I am able to see my experience in stress and turmoil in a more positive light now, although the ordeal was minimal when compared to what it could have been.

I am motivated beyond measure to love every second of my university life, and just simply live. I am filled with excitement to meet new people, create a network for myself, and yet remain just close enough to home to stay connected.

I am so very, very blessed.

Love always,

Dani.

boxing day.

So guess what I have the privilege of doing today? On this day of Boxing? Boxing Day? A maniacal day of unmeasurable shopping chaos?

I'm working.

Yup. For five hours.

I would have already lost my mind 'cept for the fact that it's my last ever shift at GAP for ever and ever and eternity.

Good riddance to you, retail.

Enjoy the pandemonium.

Love, D.

nursing, 2010.

I GOT INTO NURSING FOR WINTER, 2010!

A miracle.

Simple as that.

I have no idea how this happened, and can't even dream up an explanation as to why life turned this way. But it did!

Even though I have some last minute scrambling to get done before the first day of classes, my mom's a powerhouse when it comes to organizing paperwork and making sure all administrative stuff is taken care of.

But I can't even begin to explain the absolute joy I experienced when I was told I could be admitted in January - it was unbelievable. So I'll just leave it at that. It was unbelievable.

That was something on my 'Christmas List', if you will, and a dream of mine that came true only through the work of something beyond earthly influence.

I had already started a rough list of my top 'To-Do's" for 2010. The top item was to get into GMU for Nursing. I guess I've already knocked one off! I'll post that up later.

Now I'm all set for Christmas. Finally! I finally feel peaceful, and ready to celebrate the holiday season. I know Christmas Eve is tomorrow, but it's never too late to divulge in the festive spirit, right?

Have a Merry Christmas!

D.

in case you forgot, i'm still here!

It seems like an age and a half since I've last blogged. My only excuse is that I haven't done much, or really anything that exciting, since my last post. Well, actually all I've done has been actively waiting.

Here's a recap. I applied to BCSN at Grant Mac, only to realize that it was full before I applied. So, I was put on the Admissible Waitlist - but in the very top of the list. From there, I had a 99% chance of getting in. Basically a shoo-in. After all, I was assured that the admissions team would go through pages of the waitlisted names to ensure a full class. Turns out, the 1% of the unlikely did happen. For one budgeting reason or another, the Nursing program had to actually call admitted students and remove them from the program, making the likelihood of waitlisted students getting in impossible. So, Plan B came up, and is now in action: I will take courses applicable to Nursing in the mean time, and reapply for the Fall intake.

So that's the deal. I'm going to take Microbiology, which is rumored to be the hardest science class in the first year, as well as Psychology and Statistics to remove both Spring courses in the future. This way, I can have a few courses under my belt to lessen the load next year, and expand my summer months as Psych and Stats are usually taken in the five weeks after the majority of classes end, aka. 'till June.

I sorta wish that my transition from A to B had been as simple as the few lines above. But it has had more than it's share of ups and downs. And roadblocks. And frustrations. But the most important part is that I got through it. And, learned a few things along the way. For instance, patience is stupid. Just kidding - but not really. Mine has been tested beyond the level of retardedness. Also I've realized that Nursing is something I really, really want to do. And it's probably the smartest route to take the challenging courses first, focus on them, and get them out of the way before taking a full load in Fall. But whatever the case, I'm in for Winter 2010, and very very excited to get started.

That's pretty much it, in a teeny nutshell. Everything has fallen into place, whether or not I've decided to be patient or not. Somethings came together in the beginning, and some things are resting on the final wire. But when is all said and done : I'm going to schooooolll!!!

Peace and love.

D.

update, yo.

Sorry for the silence, friends.

Big choice coming on Tuesday/Wednesday...

Update then.

Love always,

Dani.

^{"Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life."}

Philippians 4:6

The Message

I'm such a stressed out nut right now. UGH. I feel constantly tormented by stupid 'what ifs' and backwards thoughts. My perspective is wacked, and whenever I'm faced with challenging situations, I feel like running away. This whole 'waiting' thing is retarded, and it doesn't play up on my best traits. Instead, it just stalks me from the back of my mind, always there.

But I've realized lately that my life-managing-skills are lacking in several areas, including how to deal with things beyond my control. I'm a control freak, demand things to be on time/right way. So when things need patience, and just simple faith, I start to freak out a bit. I ignore any rational approach to calm my mind, and just end up getting all worked up.

Having faith, and giving my worries to God is something I need to consciously work at. It sounds so fluffy and airy to think that He can take all my worries and anxieties, and restore peace. But it's a lot harder than it sounds. I'm ready to work on it, especially seeing how these short weeks I've spent waiting for admission will be a mere blink in no time at all.

Hopefully, when all of this is said and done, I'll be able to look back and say 'Ya, that was a challenging time in my life, but I got through it, and learned more about myself and God in the process'.

For now, it's still a day at a time, and always working toward what I know I love. Cause everything will work out. It always does.

Dani.

life right now.

Sorry for the 'changing blog site' confusion. I'm here to stay! Don't worry about a new site.

Life right now.

First off, it's snowing. But not in light fluffy flakes. I'm talking about torrential-blizzard-type snow. Mother Nature is out with a vengeance.

Im employed x3. Despite working at three different jobs, my mind is still on set on the "bored"setting.

I'm still unsure about admission for school this winter. I'm still sitting on the waitlist, which is holding up the remainder of my life. Poo you, waitlist.

Otherwise, life is trekking on as always. These few weeks I've spent working will seem so so small in no time at all, but it's getting to the spot that is so gross. I have enough saved up, which is exciting, seeing how I've had a limited time frame to make it all.

For now, I'm moving forward, taking it a day at time. Once in a while I'm still uneasy about being home. I had gotten myself ready to leave the life I knew for another, yet came back. Although I feel much more comfortable closer to home, I have a never ceasing desire to still see the world, to get on with my life. My mom was right when she said this move wouldn't be easy, although it was the right one. I just hope things sort themselves sooner rather than later.

Dani.

Ok, so I lied.

Sorry folks.

I'm not switching blogs after all... it would be too confusing for everyone to find me somewhere else, plus I have some favorite blogs I like to follow from here.

I apologize for the confusion!

Love, Dani.

untitled. duur - it's 5 am.

Cool? Getting free coffee.

Not cool? Being up at 5 am to serve coffee.

Starbucks, you are the last place I want to be right now. Just though I'd let ya know.

-D.

oh shoot.

Life is full of little surprises, and random coincidences.

Why is it that I find an interest in someone at the place where I want to be the least?

I think it's often overlooked how the people we meet influence our lives. For example - you see someone who looks like a classmate from junior high, causing you to recollect the junior high days, wondering where your old classmates got to. Someone who is a grinch at work may affirm your ever-growing distaste with the human race. It's a little intimidating to think of how our 'wake' in life affects everyone we come into contact with, both directly. and indirectly.

To prevent a negative influence, let's just stay at home! Sounds grand, until the person who looks forward to seeing your smile or your everyday 'hello' is left without their day's highlight. Or until a staff shortage at work causes everyone to grumble and complain about their doubled workload.

So what is there to do? Either way, our actions and words will make an impact. Our very being will impact someone's day. I guess this irresistible chain of affect goes to show how socially-rooted mankind is. How could we function without one another? We are shaped by those around us, and by those whose actions touch our lives.

Man, all I wanted to say is that one person's simple presence made my day just that much brighter. Instead, what came out is a jumble of words and a thought on life.

Dani.